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This is not how I want my children to remember me.

Years ago, there was a moment that shook me awake. 

And it all happened…in a mini van.

This was about 15 years ago. Back then, I was working as a real estate agent. And I was a hard worker. The hardest. 

I put in 70-hour weeks and slept with my Blackberry phone next to my bed every night, just in case a client called so I could reply immediately. I checked email 7 days a week and replied instantaneously. I was glued to my career. I put work first and everything else came second. My marriage, my kids, my health, joy, pleasure, fun? All second tier. 

One day, I picked up the kids up from school. 

Cora and Ryan were really little at the time. I strapped them into the back of the mini van. We got in, started driving home, and then…my phone rang. 

It was a contractor telling me about a termite issue at a house I was trying to sell. 

He promised me the issue would be handled by a certain date, but it wasn’t. 

I was so tense, so exhausted, and so overworked that I completely lost my cool.

I’m driving along, with the call on speaker phone, and I raised my voice and started barking orders and raging at this poor guy. My face was flushed, and I probably sounded like a complete psycho. 

Remember

That’s when I happened to glance into the rearview mirror…

…and I saw my sweet little kids’ faces. 

And they both looked terrified. 

They both had this expression on their faces like, “Uh oh. Mom is in a REALLY bad mood today.”

Seeing the horror on their faces, my heart sank into my stomach. 

After we got out of the van, I had a moment of reckoning.

All I could think was:

“This is not how I want my kids to remember their mom.”

Raving like a lunatic and screaming at a colleague about termites. What have I become?

It was a wake-up call. 

I realized, “I’ve been hustling so hard, and working so much, that I am losing myself. I am turning into a person I don’t want to be.”

Dear person reading this right now, whether you are a parent or not…

Is this story resonating with you?

Maybe lately you’ve been feeling like, “I am working way too much. My priorities all are out of whack. Something is not right.” 

Maybe you’re having health issues. Feeling disconnected from your kids. Or just feeling exhausted all the time.

Maybe this email is the wake-up call that you need.

Make a change.

The calm, joyful, successful (but not workaholic) woman that you aspire to be?

The woman who prioritizes pleasure and self-care?

The woman who takes excellent care of herself?

The woman who works smarter, not harder?

How do you want to be remembered?

Be that woman today. 

xoxo, Susan

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