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Your growth will upset some people

Haters, trolls, and bullies can unfortunately be a natural part of growing your business. 

Being a bold, unapologetic, unstoppable woman is like a magnet for unsolicited criticism.  

The only way to avoid haters is to stay small, remain quiet, and never make a scene. And those things are non-negotiable.  

So what should you do? Keep on growing, boo – and dive into today’s episode! 

Recently, I posted a job ad on my Facebook page searching for a local personal assistant.  

Within an hour, someone took the post from my Facebook profile and shared it in a group intended for virtual assistants – people who don’t work “locally.” The post lit up with comments like “is this person allowed to have their own life?” and “I can already tell this person isn’t going to pay well.”  

Another commenter gleefully wrote: “Oh my god! I know her. Do not take this job. Seriously.” (I do not know this woman.)  

This was disappointing for a number of reasons. Rampant misogyny. Lies. Women bullying other women.  

But, sadly, this wasn’t at all surprising. As you grow, you will upset people who want you to stay small – especially if that growth includes building a team and paying people (very well, I might add) to manage things like household duties.  

Success is about showing up, doing the work, taking risks, and putting yourself out there – despite the hate.  

But for some people, success is a mirror. Seeing others achieve serves as a trigger. Instead of focusing on their own goals and being active participants in making those goals happen, it’s easier to be a spectator and throw stones.  

I share these stories because: 

  1. I don’t want other people to feel alone when they get unfair criticism, and… 
  1. If you’re here in my community, I don’t want you ever to let the haters f*ck with your flow.  

I want you to keep striving, keep moving, keep achieving. And LET ‘EM TALK.  

I also don’t want you to speak up if that’s what you want to do.  

Women are often taught to just “deal” with this nonsense, as if it should be an acceptable part of our lives to take in mountains of unsolicited criticism and hate.  

Y’all, I call bullshit on that.  

Harassment, hate, bullying, and punishing women should not be ignored. That’s why I talk about this topic A LOT. I even did an entire episode on dealing with haters in episode #38.  

If you’re on the receiving end of hate, don’t ignore the situation. Know that it’s not “personal” – but it should be taken seriously.  

Take screenshots, block and report, don’t engage directly with the trolls, and get authorities involved if needed.  

Haters love to target strong, confident, successful women. They see your growth and want to shrink and shame you to be docile, obedient and silent.  

Don’t let them win.  

Just keep growing.  

ONE MORE THING BEFORE YOU GO! 

Always remember that you are worth making a scene over.  

If you are experiencing injustice, make a scene for yourself and the people you love. Don’t stand on the sidelines of your life and allow people to push you around. Stand up. Say something. That might mean calling the authorities. It might mean speaking out like I’m doing today.  

You are always worth making a scene.  

In this episode, we discuss:

  • How to make a scene. 
  • How to avoid the haters.
  • How to keep moving and achieving past those who are determined to put you down. 

Featured on the Show:

  • If you want to build your dream coaching practice, skyrocket your income, and finish 2021 strong AF.... FINISH STRONG is THE place to be. 
  • 1:1 Coaching. Choose your number one goal. Any topic: financial, business, creative, health, body, or confidence. And, partner with Susan. Work on your goal for six months in a row. Massive victories: guaranteed. 
  • Let's bring your coaching income to 100k and above. Learn more about why you should apply for my On the 6 Mastermind experience. 
  • Become a member in my free Facebook group Go Time here!
  • And while you're at it, let's be friends on Instagram!
  • Looking to become a Certified Life Coach or advance your training? Visit The University for Life Coach Training website today. 

Enjoyed this show?

FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:

Welcome to the Rich Coach Club, the podcast that teaches you how to build your dream coaching
practice and how to significantly increase your income. If you're a coach and if you're determined to
start making more money, this show is for you. I'm master certified life coach, Susan Hyatt, and I am
psyched for you to join me on this journey. Hey coaches. All right, one of the number one business
questions that I get is not what you think. The number one question I get from clients or members of the
Go Time Facebook group, or just unsolicited emailed in questions, is about how do you deal with haters?
Now listen, haters, trolls and bullies can unfortunately be a natural part of growing your business
because being a bold, unapologetic, unstoppable woman is like a magnet for unsolicited commentary
and criticism.

And the only way to avoid haters, is to stay very small, to remain quiet and just never make a
scene. And listen, those things are non-negotiable, so what do you do? Keep on growing and dive into
today's episode. Okay, so recently, I had my copywriter zhuzh up a job description for a local personal
assistant for me. And I posted that job description on my Facebook page because I really am searching
for someone local, who can make my life so much easier. And when I was traveling, someone alerted me
to the fact that someone shared the post from my Facebook profile and they put it in a group, a private
Facebook group that's intended for virtual assistants, people who don't work locally.
And the post lit up with comments like, "Is this person allowed to have their own life?," and, "I
can already tell this person isn't going to pay well." And another commenter gleefully wrote, "Oh my
God, I know her, do not take this job, seriously." Side note, I do not know this woman. We do not know
each other in any way, shape or form. And this was disappointing for a number of reasons. Rampant
misogyny, lies, women bullying other women, but sadly, this wasn't surprising at all. As you know, you
will upset people who want you to stay small, especially if that growth includes building a team and
paying people. And I pay people very well, I might add, to manage things like household duties. My
friends who were with me at the time, they were like, "Meanwhile, you've flown your entire team to LA,
like are some of them staying in this mansion with us?" But I digress.

Success is about showing up and doing the work and taking risks and putting yourself out there
despite the hate. But for some people, success is a mirror. Seeing others achieve success, serves as a
trigger. So instead of focusing on their own goals and being active participants in making those goals
happen, it's easier to be a spectator and throw stones. And by throwing stones, it can be very subtle
digs. It can be being excluded from things. I remember once, I was out with a group and I was having
some new found success in my business and I wanted to share with everyone and when the bill came, I
insisted on paying and I was like, "No, no, no, it's my treat. I'm so happy to celebrate my big win,"
basically. And someone at the table said, "Well, all right, Miss Moneybags."

And I've also been in situations where people question purchases like, "Oh, are you really going
to pay that to go do that?" And then this latest example I have of people criticizing a female CEO that
would dare advertise for a full-time personal assistant and just finding things wrong with me wanting to
have domestic help. I share these stories because A, I don't want to other people to feel alone when
they get unfair criticism and B, if you're here in my community, I don't want you ever to let the haters
fuck with your flow. I want you to keep striving, keep moving, keep achieving and let them talk. Women
are often taught to just deal with this nonsense, as if it should be an acceptable part of our lives to take
in mountains of unsolicited criticism and hate. And y'all, I call bullshit on that.

Harassment, hate bullying and punishing women should not be ignored. That's why I talk about
this topic a lot. I even did an entire episode on dealing with haters in episode number 38. So you could
go back and listen to that. If you're on the receiving end of hate, don't ignore the situation. Know that
it's not personal, but it should be taken seriously. So, in the case of these people, I mean, there were so
many comments. People just trashing this job description and me personally, people I didn't know, I just
was like, I don't have time for that, right? And the person who originally shared my job description took
the whole post down because she couldn't believe what she was seeing either. But if it's more serious, if
people are threatening you, take screenshots, block and report those people. Don't engage directly with
the trolls and get authorities involved, if you need to.

Haters love to target strong, confident, successful women. They see your growth and they want
you to shrink and they want to shame you into being docile, obedient and silent. Don't let them win, just
keep growing. All right, everybody. It's actually my favorite part of the show. This is the part where I
brag about community wins. And sometimes I brag about one-on-one clients, or members of one of my
masterminds. And today I'm going to brag about my University for Life Coach Training graduates. We
have so many and over the next several episodes, I'm going to be talking about some of the social justice
projects that they did to earn their certification. So at the University for Life Coach Training, I'm really
proud because we train coaches in the art of how to coach, but we do it through a diversity, equity and
inclusion lens. So, it's an amazing six-month program, that also includes a certification process where they have
to get a service project approved. And I wanted to talk about a couple of them.

So, Amy Stone is one of
our recent certified graduates. And I wanted to brag on her because she created a series of podcast
episodes on topics that are typically seen as barriers to entry to sport. So, hair, specifically curly hair,
natural hair, long hair, size and weight and gender identification. And she found experts on the topic of
hair and people who participated from what would be considered the non-traditional perspective, so
size and weight and gender identity. And she interviewed them about their experiences, why that topic
maybe isn't actually a barrier and what people in either side of the issue might know.
And what it turned out to be, was more important than she expected. She just so happened to
talk about how swim caps are exclusionary, right before the Olympics. And it also drove home the reality
to her, personally, of how exclusionary organized amateur adult sports are, and that it stems from the
top of those organizations. But it shouldn't be and it doesn't need to be and how so many people are
working very hard to change it, to make it better. So, I'm so proud of that project.

And also Kelly
Jackson. So, Kelly created a queer coach directory, which is the first version is available via a Dropbox
link. We're going to put it in the show notes. And she talked about while doing that service project, what
became clear to her, was that we need a community for queer coaches.
So that's a project she's put on her 2022 list, but I was flipping through her, it's like 21, 22 pages,
the queer coach directory and I was like, I have not heard of any of these folks. And they're all amazing.
So I want to encourage each of you to go to the show notes and check out Amy's podcast series, check
out Kelly's queer coach directory and look at what these university students are doing. I'm so, so, so
proud. And I want to shout from the rooftops that if you yourself are looking for additional training, you
want to check out our next round of the University for Life Coach Training. And if you're listening to this
and are considering a career change and want to become a coach, you should consider us. Or if you
know someone who has talked about becoming a life coach, share our info with them because the
University for Life Coach Training, is disrupting the industry all the best ways.

Oh, hey, I want to give a shout out to someone who calls herself Kai, K-A-I, who left me a fivestar
review, entitled, Life is delicious. Kai writes, "I love you, seriously though. Can we be friends?" Yes,
we can. "You have no idea how much your podcast alone has helped me in some seriously low points. I
can't wait to press in more into your community and become all that I can be. Thank you so much for
your podcast." Kai, that just warms my heart. Thank you so much for leaving me this five-star review and
hey, all y'all listening, if you, as well, enjoy this podcast, please head on over to Apple Podcasts and take
just a few minutes to leave us a review. It means so much more than you know.

Thank you so much for listening to today's episode. I hope you found it as inspiring as it was to
create it. And I hope it's inspired you to stand up for yourself, to make a scene, to advocate for yourself,
to not put up with nonsense. And if you need some extra help with that, I have one spot available on my
one-on-one coaching roster. I'm going to put some details in the show notes. You can also just email
support@susanhyatt.co to learn more. I would love to help you create what you crave. And always
remember that you are worth making a scene over. So if you're experiencing injustice, make a scene for
yourself and the people you love. Don't stand on the sidelines of your life and allow people to push you
around. Stand up, say something. And that might mean calling the authorities. It might mean speaking
out like I'm doing today. You are always worth making a scene.

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