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The Nerve to Fail

In this solo episode of You’ve Got Nerve, I’m diving deep into a topic that’s close to my heart and, let’s face it, an inevitable part of our lives: failure. Now, before you click away, thinking this episode is going to be a downer, let me stop you right there.  

We’ve all felt like the world is crashing down because something didn’t go as planned. Society is obsessed with the pursuit of perfection and often paints failure in such a negative light that it’s no wonder we’re terrified of it. From a young age, we’re conditioned to aim for straight A’s, the perfect job, a flawless life. 

But aiming for perfection is not only unrealistic, it’s also incredibly limiting. 

And failure is not the end of the world—it’s actually something to celebrate.

In this episode, we discuss:

In this episode, I explore:

  • How the founder of Spanx was encouraged by her father to embrace failure from a young age.
  • The pitfalls of playing it safe and how it limits your chances.
  • Real-life examples of successful people facing and overcoming failure.
  • Practical tips to reframe failure as a learning opportunity, a badge of courage, and a catalyst for growth.

Tune in to discover how your next “fail” could be the very thing that changes your life.

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FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:

Susan (00:00):
Is there something you wish you had the nerve to do? Welcome to, you've Got Nerve, the podcast that teaches you how to conquer your fears, upgrade your mindset, and get up the nerve to go after whatever you want. If you wish you had the guts to go all in on your goals, dreams, and desires, this show is for you. I'm master certified life coach Susan Hyatt, and I am so excited for you to join me on this journey. In today's solo episode, we're talking about the nerve to fail or as I like to say, the nerve to toast your flops. Okay, so alright, BooBerry, we're going to get real for just a second. The world's got this strange obsession with winning all the time. One of my favorite songs used to be that song. All I do is win, win, win no matter what, and it's like we're supposed to look at failure as some kind of big, bad monster from a horror movie.

(01:06):
I know I spent most of my life afraid of failure. So if you find yourself running away screaming from failure, then this episode is lovingly for you. So I recently heard about and then watched an interview with Sarah Blakely, the founder of Spanx, and in the piece she shared how she grew up with a dad who was all about celebrating failure every night at dinner, he asked, so what did you fail at today? No failure to report was basically a family faux pa. It meant you played it too safe. Playing it safe might be comfortable, but it usually means you're missing out on the richness of life. And life becomes so much more meaningful when we're willing to take risks, even if it means occasionally failing, and it's in these moments of boldness. When we step out of our comfort zones and face the possibility of not succeeding, of not winning, that's when we really learn and grow.

(02:15):
I know, I know, I know. I don't like it either. I don't like that. That's how we learn and grow, but that's how it's done. So rather than steering clear of the potential of failing, consider what adventures and lessons you might be missing out on. Life's most rewarding experiences often come from the courage to try fail and then try again. Don't believe me. Let's look at some real life. Epic fails. Okay, here's a favorite take. Michael Jordan, for example, the man's practically the cover model for failing successfully. As he famously said, I've missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games, 26 times. I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and I missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed. Basketball players, they're taking shots left and right, but each miss that's just prep for the next swish.

(03:29):
See what I did there? But how about entrepreneurs? Statistically 90% of startups fail in the first year, and I know I have a lot of coaches in this audience. It's not exclusive to the coaching industry, okay? Any entrepreneurial endeavor, 90% of them fail in just the first year. So if you've passed your first year, congratulations. But many of those brave souls, y'all get right back up and start again. Even Steve Jobs once got the boot from Apple and what'd he do? He came back and revolutionized. Well, everything. Talk about a comeback. And then there's good old science. All science is experimentation, trial and error. Every failed experiment is just science's way of nudging you closer to that life-changing result. So now that we've got some real life proof that failure's awesome, let's talk about how to turn your failures into high fives. The first thing to do is shift your mindset.

(04:45):
Failing is a learning curve. Imagine each flub as the universe giving you a nod of encouragement like it's cheering you on, saying, look at you daring to step out of your comfort zone. When you fail, reflect on what didn't work and why it didn't work. Adjust your strategy and dive back in with renewed determination. Each misstep is a valuable lesson in disguise. Make sure to hunt for those insights like you're mining for gold. Then we can look at failure as an opportunity to dial up our courage. So what if the outcome wasn't what you expected? The act of trying anything is so commendable. I want you to proudly wear your I Tried badge. It's a reminder that you possess the sheer audacity to try something new, something not everyone is willing to do. And also look at your setbacks as a setup for your growth.

(05:53):
Boy oh boy, is this something I'm leaning into? Welcoming failure with open arms is like a massive dose of self-love. You get to build resilience, perseverance and flexibility, and learn to better, adapt to change. Safe choices rarely lead to significant growth. Each fail is an opportunity to rise higher and finally toast to your flaps every time you fail. Raise a glass. I'm serious y'all. I'm all about the celebration factor, but we also have to celebrate like, yeah, I tried that. That was a massive flop. And you know what? I had the guts to do that. So I want to know, what's your latest mess up? Got a project that went sideways, or a goal that's not working out good. That means you're in the game. That means you're growing. So your next fail might just be the stumble that leads to your greatness.

(07:08):
I have some ways that we can work together and play together. So I don't know if you've heard, but I'm bringing back a lot of my brunches, tea parties and dinner parties. And the next one is happening in Palm Springs on March 17th. It's called the Power Table. At this recording, I have three spots left, so it's March 17th, 1130 am DM US for details. I would love to sell those last three tickets. I also have coming up June 1st through the eighth, 2024, my Ireland retreat. Join me for jaw dropping excursions, OMG worthy moments and the space to reconnect to yourself and your priorities in the emerald aisle. One part life coaching, one part adventure. This whirlwind trip will be a week you'll never forget. I am accepting applications for one-on-one coaching and VIP yes days. This is when you're ready to go all in and pursue your goals like you mean it. So check out the application. I would love to work with you. And remember, if you failed at something today, this past week, this past month, I'm fricking proud of you. You know what? I'm proud of you and guess what? I am going to be right there with you to dust you off and tell you to try again.

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