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The Nerve to be in Your Prime

Society has long peddled a narrative that suggests our ‘prime’ is a brief, fleeting phase, nestled in youth. Especially for women, hitting our 40s, 50s, 60s, and beyond often comes with a rather disheartening message: the best years are behind us. 

But hold up, isn’t that just a tired, old tune we’ve been made to dance to? What if we declared that our prime isn’t a thing of the past but a dynamic, ever-evolving present? What if we embraced a stage of life where our experiences, both bitter and sweet, have blended together to create a richer, more robust version of ourselves? This is where true strength, unshakeable confidence, and profound wisdom come into play, characteristics that only time and experience can nurture. This is our PRIME.

In this solo episode, I’m challenging outdated, patriarchal standards that have long defined women’s worth and exploring a radical new definition of prime. Think of it as being marinated in the diverse experiences of life, making you tougher, wiser, and incredibly resilient. This is a prime defined by the incredible layers of life you’ve embraced and the wisdom you’ve gained along the way.

In this episode, we discuss:

Questions to consider:

  1. What outdated societal expectations am I still holding onto?
  2. How can I redefine success on my own terms?
  3. What does confidence mean to me now, versus in my younger years?
  4. What habits do I need to change to align more closely with my goals and values?
  5. What brings me joy, and how can I incorporate more of it into my life?
  6. How can I build more connections that enrich and empower me?
  7. What are the limiting beliefs about aging that I need to let go of?
  8. In what ways have I become stronger over the years?
  9. What new skills or hobbies have I always wanted to try?
  10. In what ways can I challenge myself to step out of my comfort zone?
  11. How can I become an energy maker rather than an energy taker?
  12. What legacy do I want to create and leave behind?

If you want to redefine the narrative around aging, challenge the patriarchal playbook, and embrace your prime, give this episode a listen!

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I’ll also be announcing an exciting new program in the coming weeks - all about savoring your PRIME. Stay tuned!

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FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:

Susan Hyatt (00:00):
Is there something you wish you had the nerve to do? Welcome to, you've Got Nerve, the podcast that teaches you how to conquer your fears, upgrade your mindset, and get up the nerve to go after whatever you want. If you wish you had the guts to go all in on your goals, dreams, and desires, this show is for you. I'm master certified life coach Susan Hyatt, and I am so excited for you to join me on this journey. In today's episode, I'm coming at you solo to talk about having the nerve to be in your prime. Now, you're going to hear me talk a lot about the concept of prime this year, and I have an exciting announcement coming soon, but let's get the conversation started. Now, in a world that often sees youth as the prime of our lives, it's a harsh reality that us women, particularly in midlife, are frequently told that our prime is in the past.

(01:04):
This narrative steeped in ageism and misogyny shaped by patriarchal standards insists that our value diminishes with age. But let's challenge this outdated and ridiculous perspective because what if your prime isn't a fleeting moment in youth, but a period of unparalleled strength, confidence, and wisdom that comes in your forties and beyond? Now, traditionally, your prime has been defined as a period of life characterized by peak physical and intellectual performance, but this definition fails to acknowledge the depth resilience and richness that comes with experience and age. I propose a radical redefinition of your prime, your forties and beyond is the most incredible stage of life. It's like you've been marinating in this sauce of life experiences making you tougher, wiser, and resilient. You've got this deep seated confidence now knowing exactly who you are, what you want, and where you draw the line. It's like fine wine, getting better with H.

(02:27):
We're talking about a prime time that's less about the number of candles on your cake, and I hope you eat that cake and more about the rich, flavorful layers you've added to your life. And I'll warn you the patriarchy we'll do just about everything to resist this narrative. Why? Because of control. A woman who recognizes her value, wisdom, and strength as she ages is a woman who is less likely to conform to societal expectations that serve patriarchal interests. She's more likely to question, to lead, to take up space, all actions that challenge the status quo and smash the patriarchy. To fully embrace your prime, you've got to first reflect and reevaluate. Here are some questions to help you get started. Number one, what outdated societal expectations am I still holding onto? Reflect on any shoulds and musts that you've internalized over the years. So for example, the belief that you have to maintain a youthful appearance or a certain body type to be considered attractive or worthy.

(03:48):
Challenge this by embracing your natural aging process and celebrating the unique beauty and strength of your body at any age. Now listen, I know some of y'all are like, Susan, I just got Botox. Shut up. Okay, this is not about that. This is about you really examining how your aging face and body is appearing, and can you start to tell yourself something different than a negative dialogue that you've been fed about wrinkles, cellulite, sagging, all of those things. Number two, how can I redefine success on my own terms? Now listen, this is something that I encourage people to do at any age because success doesn't have to be what everyone else says it should be. Maybe it's finally diving into that hobby you've always pushed aside or getting that warm fuzzy feeling when you help someone else grow. It could be nailing that perfect harmony between your work and personal life, or simply finding those moments of pure, simple joy, your version of success.

(05:06):
It's whatever makes your heart sing. Now, I never in a million years thought that baking a successful batch of scones or cookies would give me the same rush as holding my book that I wrote in my hands. So there are so many different ways that you can define success that doesn't look like the external validation we're taught it should be. Okay. Number three, what does confidence mean to me now versus in my younger years? Reflect on how your understanding of confidence has evolved. So maybe before it was about that external validation, but now it's about self-assurance and inner strength. Confidence comes from the inside out. So confidence might manifest in saying no to unreasonable demands or taking pride in your own unique journey. So when I was younger, confidence meant that I was willing to put myself out there, which okay, it still takes confidence to do that, but in my older years now, now that I'm 50, confidence is different. It's a quieter ability to feel great about myself no matter what.

(06:39):
Okay, number four, what habits do I need to change to align more closely with my own goals and values? So identify habits that hold up your progress. It's interesting because as humans, we're kind of designed and built to enjoy progress. And so if you value health but often skip movement, exercise, consider incorporating a daily movement. If lifelong learning is your goal, replace some of that Netflix time with reading or taking online courses. Small changes lead to significant transformations. Number five, what brings me joy and how can I incorporate more of it into my life? Identify simple pleasures that light up your day and find ways to weave those joys into your routine. So for example, dedicate weekend mornings to your art or join a community cooking class. Number six, how can I build more connections that enrich and empower me? Seek out connections, friends, colleagues, communities and groups that share your interests of values.

(07:59):
So don't hesitate to reach out to someone whose work or their life approach you admire greatly. Those connections can offer support, inspiration, and growth. Number seven, what are the limiting beliefs about aging that I need to let go of? Challenge stereotypes that associate aging with decline. Embrace the wisdom, resilience and experience that come with age and recognize the value in your life story and understand that personal growth doesn't have a deadline. Number eight, in what ways have I become stronger over the years? Acknowledge your journey in the challenges you've overcome. This could be professional achievements, personal growth or resilience. In the face of those challenges, celebrate these strengths and them be a source of confidence. Number nine, what new skills or hobbies have I always wanted to try? Ever wanted to learn to play an instrument, speak a new language or something else? Now is the time.

(09:12):
Enroll in a class or seek out other resources. Embrace a beginner's mindset and enjoy the process of learning free from the pressure of perfection. Number 10, in what ways can I challenge myself to step out of my comfort zone? So consider activities that feel slightly intimidating yet exciting. Maybe it's public speaking, solo travel or starting a blog. These challenges can lead to personal growth and unexpected opportunities. Number 11, how can I become an energy maker rather than an energy taker? Now, this is one of my favorites because people are always asking me, how do you have so much energy and how do you find the time? Right? I consider myself an energy maker and a time creator. So you want to focus on positivity, gratitude and how you can contribute to others' wellbeing. So this might involve volunteering, offering support to friends or bringing enthusiasm into your workplace.

(10:24):
Being an energy maker is about sharing your light and uplifting those around you. Sometimes I refer to it as being a lighthouse. Number 12, what legacy do you want to create and leave behind? So think about the impact that you have on those around you, your community, family, the world, your legacy could be about inspiring others through your career. It could be raising children who break generational curses or contributing to a cause that you're passionate about. But remember, a legacy is built day by day. Doesn't happen just overnight, right? It takes time and it happens through your actions and choices. So here's the thing, your prime is not past tense. It's a vibrant, ongoing present and a hopeful, promising future. It's a time to celebrate who you are and who you are becoming. It's prime time BooBerry.

(11:36):
Alright, so here's the thing. I fully believe I'm in my prime and I want to help others. Maybe you don't quite yet believe you're in your prime. Maybe you're like, I don't know, Susan, my energy's down, my revenue's down, my sex drive is down. I don't know. I don't feel like I'm in my prime. Listen, if you want to work with me in 2024, I've got some options to help energize you and bring out your best self. One-on-one coaching. This is my highest level. So if you're ready to go all in and pursue your goals, like you mean it, come work with me one-on-one, we'll create major breakthroughs in your life and achieve goal after goal after goal. This is the most intense and personalized experience I offer. Another way would be a VIP Yes Day with me. This is a private luxurious over the top day with me, just us face-to-face, working on whatever you want.

(12:39):
We can spend the whole day mapping out a business plan, figuring out how to make a major transition, creating your legacy project that would be the work you want to be known for or anything else you want to accomplish. I have such a great set of testimonials from recent VIP days. You want to check those out. I'm going to put links to applications in the show notes. There's also international retreats. I believe that travel is such a gift and it's a great way to make new friends, see the world experience trips with me that are so luxe. You'll be like, are we in a movie? All of my retreats combine life coaching, career business planning, unforgettable excursions and cultural adventures. So from the moment you land to that last sip of champagne, I've got everything ready for you to savor. In 2024, we're going to Ireland and Spain and Morocco. So you could sign up for any of those, and I'll be announcing an exciting new program in the coming weeks, all about savoring your prime. So stay tuned.

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